Friday, December 31, 2010

A Sleepy Mama/Happy New Year!

I write this as a way to keep myself awake this New Year's Eve...our party begins at 9, and I'm wondering if this Mama is gonna keep herself awake.

So here's a little review and reflection of our life altering 2010:

Fredrik's first words this morning: "Kysa, today is the last day of the first year you were born." If Kysa hadn't smiled her goofy two-toothed smile, I would have cried. I've never been this nostalgic on a New Year's Eve and I attribute it to the state of being a parent that I call "constantly smiling with tears in your eyes."

In early 2010, I felt time stretch on forever, as my belly seemed to do as well. I felt the raw, powerful surge of divine feminine energy with the natural birth of Kysa. I still marvel at the body's miraculous ability to grow a beautiful little being, and at just the perfect time nudge that little person out into the world. After the most physically and emotionally powerful experience of my life, I then felt my heart split wide open to love in ways I never knew possible, and with that love came the snap of time that makes my head swim. Perhaps it was the splitting open of my heart, of all our hearts, that led us down this adoption road so quickly after Kysa's birth. I understand a little bit more about the heart's capacity to love and I trust that our hearts will continue to open wide to a new family member, our little Mamoosh. I just can't wait to see his face...

2010 and Kysa have taught me deeper and simpler ways to be present. Just feeling her breathe as she sleeps on my chest is the greatest of gifts. Midway through 2010 Fredrik and I made a commitment to ourselves, our planet and our fellow beings to go vegan (no meat or dairy). We haven't been perfect (I still haven't eaten meat:) but we do our best, and have enjoyed our new relationship to food, to each other, and to our planet. We look forward to continuing our vegan diet into 2011...YUM YUM!!

In the meantime, while we enjoy our sweet Kysa and eagerly await our Mamoosh, my New Year's resolutions are:
To be present with the bliss, to soak it up, and not take a day for granted.
To be grateful
To walk softly on Mother Earth.
To love BIG and give BIG
To Swiffer more often and put the laundry away in a timely manner,
...and to do forearm stand without a wall:)

Happy New Year All!
May 2011 be a year of boundless possibilities and joy.

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